It's a very clear memory. I came out of the bathroom, wiping away tears of joy and nervousness. My blonde was still dozing. I sat on the bed beside her, stroking her shoulders. Smiling, I handed her the pregnancy test with the two pale lines that would change our lives. She was a mother.
It'll never happen. You can take it easy, but announcing to your partner that you're expecting a baby will always be a mom's responsibility.
Mom's pregnant, dad's in shock
It was the December, 23 2017, around 6 a.m. Yes, announcements are always made very early in the morning, because it’s from morning pee that you can extract the information. Afternoon pee has no idea what’s going on.
I was ... surprised, let's put it that way. I had to Google images of positive pregnancy tests to convince myself, I found the lines a little too pale to draw a conclusion. Is that denial?
The project was brand new. We'd stopped taking birth control pills just a few weeks before (I didn't like the taste, anyway). My girlfriend had been telling me for a while that the average wait before getting pregnant was 6 months. I hit well below the average, just like at university ...
Mom and Dad on the first try
It happens. On the first attempt, I made a circuit, a hole-in-one, a clean top, a draw on the button (curling metaphor).
A month of waiting. In fact, after a month, I don't think you could say we were waiting. Personally, I was still warming up. I didn't have to live through the moment when ovulations are registered on my electronic calendar, and my girlfriend calls me at work to say: "At noon, you're coming home for dinner, my man!
I'm not complaining, we're lucky. I was just struck by the news that I'd become a father so quickly, that's all.
Don't announce it too quickly
Mom has to tell Dad as soon as she finds out. That makes sense. No guy wants to be surprised!
But when do we tell the others? A positive pregnancy test is hard news to hide. Announcing to my friends and brother that I'm going to be a father, to my parents that they're going to be grandparents, to my racquetball partner that I'm going to be a lot less available... it burns the lips!
But you have to hold your tongue at the beginning. You don't want to announce that you're going to be a parent too soon, and then have to announce that you're not going to be one anymore...
Every couple has its own way of doing things
When do we say it? It's not written in any book or on any discussion forum, and the experiences of the parents around us are all different. Is there a better time? After the first doctor's appointment? After the first ultrasound? When Mom gets caught sneaking a non-alcoholic beer?
There's probably no right or wrong time, no too early or too late. If you come up with a game plan that works for Mom and Dad, and stick to it, you'll have passed this stage with flying colors.
What about us? We escaped the news a little
We had a game plan, that's for sure. Wait for the first appointment with the doctor to confirm that everything was in order before telling anyone.
It was supposed to take about four weeks. We held out for 26 hours.
And by we, I mean her.
It was the morning of December 24, the day after her positive pregnancy test. She had planned a Christmas lunch with her two great friends.
On his return :
- And darling, how did it go? You didn't tell them, did you?
- Max, they know me by heart, I couldn't hide from them...
- Come on! You've been pregnant for a day! You could have denied it!
- I'm telling you, they guessed it.
- Okay, look, it doesn't matter. If they guessed, it's not your fault. Otherwise, it was fun?
- Yes! You should have seen their faces when they opened their Christmas present. It was worth a million.
- What did you give them?
-Little suckers.
– (…)
It burns the lips, I told you, han?
